Those days are gone, when we first meet the guy, take two weeks to hold hands, one month to kiss, and after few months of strictly non-sexual romance, we gradually move forward to being physical. Now, it is all about sex. All we seem to care about is deeds and its details. Last month, i read a question by a women on an online dating forum, asking for help because his date hasn’t kissed her on the second date. One of the responses even mentioned the possibility of the man being gay. We measure our relationship status on the level of intensity in sex. One of my friend once told me ‘I will know i love her. only after having sex with her’. Sex is now the ultimate key to ‘find the one’.
We have sex for many reasons, including lust, reliving stress, patching things up or even to remember that person by. These reasons change once we enter into a committed relationship. The number one reason to take things to bed is to convey how much we care about the person, how much we love him. The secondary reason is to stay close to him whereas how good it feels trails to the third place. Relationship changes the definition of sex. As we grow mature, we seems to care about the relationship more even if the sex is weak. This wisdom comes from different experiences and responsible shifts in the priorities. Excellent partnerships doesn’t really implies great sex but surely can increase the possibility of great sex.
It is hard to say where relationship and Sex intersects. There are no rules what comes first. A relationship can fail or succeed either way of course. Its our priorities who decides what we need in our life.
Well, I am late to state the end of my first tinder experiment. He did call to assure that he will set the time for third date on Sunday. Well the message arrived too but he didn’t, and the worst part I didn’t feel bad. This was the time I knew I have entered to this vicious world of online dating.
We text, flirt, meet, kiss or fuck but are we ready to be in a relationship, or even considering the idea to be in a relationship. Or we are just driven by the infatuation/lust. One of my girl friend once said “I need to have sex on first date to know whether I am going on the second date with him or not.” Sometimes I wonder, whether we are searching for love or a great fuck with a minute possibility of love. We have entered the era where we are so impatient or vulnerable to be physical first even if we want a relationship with the person.
Well oxford defines happiness as the state of being happy, smart people will probably say pleasant emotions.
For me it is the perfect way to live. Happiness is when u see an infant laugh. It is in his little hands. Happiness is ice-cream. It is in the rain. Happiness is mesmerizing mountains, night stars full of blazing stars, chirping birds. Happiness is doing something for others, making a person smile. Happiness is making your parents proud. Happiness is friends, irritating them as much as you can. Happiness is watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S. Happiness is an irritating brother, who blows your mind off. Happiness is music. Happiness is a good book, you can’t wait to complete. Happiness is lying on bed, doing nothing, saying nothing or even thinking nothing. Happiness is travelling, without telling anyone. Happiness is to be in love or being loved. Happiness is expressing that love, hugging or kissing. Happiness is having the courage to be different. Happiness is positive thinking, appreciate what you have and realizing it is the choice that you can make today.
So tell people to make that choice and BE HAPPY because everyone deserves it.
It was not so easy for me to find the courage to go on a date with an unknown guy (in his car) after three lines of conversation consisting only emoticons. Thanks to tinder, we have become so open to go out with random person judging them only on their looks. I was date-ready in my blue skinny jeans, Deep red lower-neck top, Black boots and classic red lips. He seemed nervous when he welcomed me, but after an hour long conversation about Paris and Parisian life while touring the whole city, we become comfortable. It was watching the city with Parisian eyes. We had a great dinner in a very fancy restaurant. He complemented on my beauty. I smiled. Our thinking matched, we both were in favor of preserving our own cultures. We had similar thoughts on Love; we have to work on it, everyday. He admitted to be an emotional person, attached to family with Italian roots. I could imagine myself staring at him while he keeps on talking. Everything was falling on the right place. The prospects were promising. After dinner, We went to Montmarte to enjoy the bird’s eye view of Paris in night. And then we headed to my place. He asked my number, I dropped him a message. We reached, the moment stopped. He said “I know this is not the right place of me to ask but I like you so much, can I kiss you?” I was hoping something like that. I touched his cheek with my trembling hand and a helpless face. His lips touched mine, we made out like we belonged together. He started caressing my breasts, I can still feel the chills. I did not want either of us to stop and he wanted more. I came in to my senses; we were in the middle of the road. I told him I need to go, but we were inseparable. Finally I left with a heavy heart and a promise of a second date next day. I messaged him as soon as i reached to my room. He was all over my mind. Well, I did not sleep the whole night.